Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles

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(256): View more from Alabama

I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip

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(503): View more from Oregon

hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon

(1-503): View more from Oregon

all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis

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(360): View more from Washington

she smelled like a LAN party

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(215): View more from Pennsylvania

It was confusing and full of hummus

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(520): View more from Arizona

His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now

(310): View more from California

Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"

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(316): View more from Kansas

Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.

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(509): View more from Washington

Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....

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