...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
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There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go