i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
