Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Quick, to the slutcave!
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
