i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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