honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
do herpes really smell.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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