One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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