so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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