there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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