Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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