I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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