Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm both gender and math confused
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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