he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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