I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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