is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
