Screwed.edu
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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