every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
