Your face is a jimmy john
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
