***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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