that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
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I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
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God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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