dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize