It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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