This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
