Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize