He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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