East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
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