Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
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At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
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fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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