She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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