I'm gonna have a badass scar
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
