youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
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