East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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