We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
