Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm both gender and math confused
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