Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
