she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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