She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
