If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
