What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize