Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
