I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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