Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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