i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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