i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
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Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
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