How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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