Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
