Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
