Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
