Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize