i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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