my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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