She's JV to your varsity
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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